How to get caught for ordering cocaine 101

When it comes to smuggling drugs, the plan is to try and be as down low as possible in regards to bringing attention to yourself. I mean, i’m not a drug smuggler or anything but i’d like to think its common sense. I mean of course there’s always the school of thought which dictates that the more obvious it is the less likely that people will suspect anything but even then it has to be done rather intelligently.

One way not to do it is to use the name of a famous movie villain. Police in Italy have seized packets of what was supposed to pass as coffee beans.. except each individual bean had been stuffed with cocaine. Yup, talk about hard work right?

You’d think hollowing out coffee beans and stuffing them with cocaine is a fool proof plan and perhaps in normal circumstances, it would’ve worked. The problem is, the parcel was addressed to Santino D’Antonio, the same freaking name as the fictional mob boss in John Wick: Chapter 2. Smooth, man.. real smooth.

Customs officers at Milan’s Malpensa airport found 130 grams of cocaine hidden in two kilograms of coffee beans that arrived from Colombia but you see, they only decided to actually properly search the package because the addressee shared the name of John Wick’s nemesis in the second movie.

I mean, is it weird that Italian cops remember the name of the baddie from John Wick? Just a little, but you see, sometimes knowledge of pop culture can help you in life, as this instance has shown. As you’d expect, the police managed to trace the package back to Florence, where a 50-year old Italian (or i-talian if you’re Enzo Gorlomi) man was arrested.

Let this be a lesson to all you kids, don’t drink and drive!!

Nah but for realsies, don’t do drugs either.

Oh and stay in school too.